Being a teacher is continually teaching me a new perspective of God. This week a student was complaining to me, "Ms. why do you have to make it so hard? Why can't you just give us an easy assignment. Why do we have to go through all these hard problems?". "Because that is the only way you will learn..." As I gave this response to him it hit me, that is exactly how it is with God. I tend to complain in my head sometimes, "God why does this have to be so hard, why can't the job be easier, why are there so many frustrations in my day..." the list goes on and on. As I gave that response to my student all of a sudden it became perfectly clear to me. Because that is the only way I will learn. Just like I stay after school tutoring and helping students with their tricky math problems, God is there to help me with my difficulties, not to get rid of them. This isn't a new idea, its something I've always been taught and known; it just seemed a whole lot clearer to me.
This week went by really fast. It was a four day school week, Friday was parent teacher conferences. We were all pretty exhausted to start the week, grades were due on Monday so we stayed up late finishing them Sunday night. Many of my seniors began doing their make up work (for failed classes) so they can graduate after school. So starting Monday I had over 10 students in my classroom everyday. It was a little stressful at first, usually after school I sit quietly planning in my classroom tutoring a few students as they trickle in and out; but now there were 3 students asking what to do for U.S. history, 2 more trying to make up Algebra 1, and 5 other students asking for help on different assignments from the week. The text books needed for make up work seemed to be missing from the library and through all the chaos I couldn't begin planning until over an hour after school! Chaos makes life a little more fun though :). It gave me a chance to talk more with students I don't always get to talk to a lot and with the end of the year so close, I'll take any opportunity to spend time with my students. Thursday was a harder day. Tuesday night Sabrina and I went to help with the evangelistic meeting in the village of Gagil. The meeting was in a little outdoor meeting house. It is a simple building, a roof with poles holding it up, no chairs or walls. Everyone crowded in and sat to listen. We lead the music and sang a special song. Out of all the places we've had meetings, I think that was my favorite. It was so informal and simple. The hardest day of the week was Thursday. It was one of those days that makes me realize we are more then teachers. One of the junior girls I have become close to throughout this year ran past my classroom in tears and went into the bushes crying. I went after her and sat with her for a while as she cried the kind of tears that show deep pain. The principal took over later and sent me back to class, it was a while before I got to talk to her. When I did she just unloaded about her struggles her problems. I felt honored that she would trust me and seek me for help and I just prayed for the right words to say and the right things to do to help her. Some days it seems like I'm just teaching them math problems they will try their best to forget over the summer, but we are more then that. Teaching is what opens the way to help with the things that can really make a difference in a students life.
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